I often go to confession and do my best to confess this particular sin I am faulting on, it seems always. I go in and try to say it without actually saying it, so that Father would not really know what it was, but God on the other hand already does. And when I leave I have some form of satisfaction, but still I don't because though I have absolution, it was not for the deed that was misdone. Pretty much like I am doing here.
The misdeed in question is masturbation. Once I had courage to tell a priest at a different church, and that priest became quite upset. Which of course scared me, not because I did not deserve is, but what will my parish priest think of me from now on.
Well I appreciate you listening(reading), its nice to have someone to talk to on this, a chance maybe to let the demon escape to haunt me no more. I understand I may not get a repose to this, I image you are quite busy. I know how are priests are, we have two, but one is retired. I hope your parish is in good health.
Sorry I'm so slow getting back. I am sure you pastor would understand since it is such a common sin. Still you might want to see if there is a nearby parish with a convenient confession schedule. The grace of confession and communion will eventually enable you to overcome the sinful habit. Sometimes God allows Satan to tempt us - and for us to fall repeatedly - so that we learn the greatest virtue, humility and complete dependence upon him. I encourage you to read St. Therese, especially her Autobiography.
Fr. Phil Bloom
Reflection on Overcoming Masturbation
Sexual Fantasies and Masturbation (a normal way to release tensions?)
Will God Always Forgive?
About the Sacrament of Confession
Answers to Frequently Asked Questions on Birth Control, Pre-Marital Sex, Dancing, Intimate Touching, Homosexuality, etc.